The Untangled Self

The Untangled Self

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Therapy

The Anxious Attachment Trap: Why Expressing Needs Feels Threatening
Anxiously attached individuals don't withhold their needs out of stubbornness. Their nervous system was trained to treat asking as dangerous.
 • Rob Lefort
Avoidant Attachment: How Self-Sufficiency Defends Against Love
People with avoidant attachment don’t feel less—they’ve learned that needing costs too much. Autonomy becomes an armor until therapy lowers it.
 • Rob Lefort
Emotional Ownership, and the Distance Between Trigger and Choice
Triggers don't come out of nowhere. They're data. Learn how self-awareness, accountability, and strategic pausing transform reactions into choices and…
 • Rob Lefort
Wired to Be Wrong: How Bias Shapes What We Think We Know
Your brain evolved to cut corners, and it's remarkably good at it. A psychologist's take on cognitive bias: why it exists and how awareness of it might…
 • Rob Lefort
Never Good Enough: The Hidden Cost of Perfectionism
Perfectionism feels like ambition but acts like a wound. Unpack where it comes from, what it costs you, and how to stop chasing approval you were never…
 • Rob Lefort
Why Your Brain Treats Bad Relationships Like a Slot Machine
The dopamine trap makes you choose people who keep you guessing. Here's the neuroscience behind why chaos feels like chemistry—and how to break the…
 • Rob Lefort
Your Brain is Lying to You: The Hidden Culprit Behind Anxiety
Cognitive distortions fuel anxiety and depression by making your brain interpret reality as more threatening than it is. Learn how CBT helps you…
 • Rob Lefort
The Self Sabotage Playbook: How We Torpedo Our Own Lives
Discover why you unconsciously sabotage your relationships and success, how childhood patterns drive self-destruction, and what actually works to break…
 • Rob Lefort
Breaking Neediness Addiction: A Therapist's Guide
Learn why your brain treats unanswered texts like life-or-death situations and discover practical techniques to love without drowning in desperation.
 • Rob Lefort
The Deadly Rise of AI Therapy Chatbots
A 29-year-old health analyst died by suicide after ChatGPT became her therapist. A psychologist's urgent plea about the dangerous rise of AI therapy…
 • Rob Lefort
Surviving An Affair: A Forensic Look at Infidelity, its Causes and Recovery Paths
A couples therapist's forensic examination of why good people risk everything for affairs—and how couples can use the wreckage to build something…
 • Rob Lefort
Psychology and Stoicism: How Philosophy Shaped Therapy
Exploring how ancient Stoic philosophy laid the groundwork for modern therapeutic approaches like CBT and psychoanalysis, proving that some wisdom is…
 • Rob Lefort
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