The Untangled Self
Subscribe
Sign in
Home
Notes
Psychology
Identity
Relationships
Therapy
Neuroscience
About
Relationships
Latest
Top
Discussions
Open Relationships: When Sexual Liberation Meets Tuesday Morning Carpools
A psychotherapist's perspective on open relationships: The research, the risks, and what nobody tells you about navigating non-monogamy with kids…
Feb 3
•
Rob Lefort
6
3
The Belonging Paradox: Why Trying to Fit in Guarantees You Never Will
Why do we feel like outsiders everywhere? Learn how pre-rejecting yourself creates the belonging problem you're trying to avoid.
Jan 27
•
Rob Lefort
9
1
5
Beyond Body Count: The Scientific Predictors of Infidelity
The research-backed truth about infidelity: from eye movements to evolutionary instincts, what science actually reveals about who cheats and why.
Jan 13
•
Rob Lefort
41
4
6
Why Introverts Overspend Their Social Budget and End Up Exhausted
For introverts, conversations comes with an emotional cost. Learn what happens when your nervous system spends more than it can recharge, and how to…
Jan 7
•
Rob Lefort
14
4
2
The Subtle Art of Not Taking Your Partner For Granted
How to stop expecting your partner to read your mind, and discover a better way to communicate your needs to create a sustainable, balanced…
Dec 17, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
18
5
We're Breaking Up Over Promises We Never Made
Most couples don't fail because they break agreements—they fail because they never made them.
Nov 26, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
45
2
6
You're Not Broken—Your Survival Strategy Is
Why capable people suddenly feel like they're disappearing—and what's actually collapsing when you can't recognize yourself anymore.
Nov 20, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
14
1
3
Why Your Brain Treats Bad Relationships Like a Slot Machine
The dopamine trap makes you choose people who keep you guessing. Here's the neuroscience behind why chaos feels like chemistry—and how to break the…
Nov 13, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
19
4
Borderline Personality and Relationships: When Love Isn't Enough
A therapist's honest, practical guide to navigating relationships with someone who has BPD—without the usual platitudes or oversimplifications.
Oct 9, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
17
4
3
The Qualia Dilemma: Why We Can Never Fully Understand Each Other
Ever wonder why you feel misunderstood even by those closest to you? Explore why perfect human understanding is impossible—and why that might be the…
Sep 30, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
3
2
Breaking Neediness Addiction: A Therapist's Guide
Learn why your brain treats unanswered texts like life-or-death situations and discover practical techniques to love without drowning in desperation.
Sep 27, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
48
3
10
Why Emotional Maturity is the Ultimate Relationship Dealbreaker
A look at the research-backed signs of emotional maturity that predict relationship success—and why settling for less keeps you stuck in toxic patterns.
Sep 20, 2025
•
Rob Lefort
58
6
11
This site requires JavaScript to run correctly. Please
turn on JavaScript
or unblock scripts
